Random Junkie Christ Thread

pryjmaty · Post by **pryjmaty** » Tue Jan 13, 2004 11:34 pm

junkie christ wrote: i dont even really like anyone. and thats including alot of my friends for that matter..

*raises her eyebrows at J_C*

:P:P:P

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Wed Jan 14, 2004 12:02 am

LadyIvanna wrote:
junkie christ wrote: i dont even really like anyone. and thats including alot of my friends for that matter..

*raises her eyebrows at J_C* :P:P:P

your exempt.... but the horsehair and me are still bitter rivals...
:bow:

love ya babe. yews family.

gwenhwyfar · Post by **gwenhwyfar** » Wed Jan 14, 2004 12:44 am

junkie christ wrote:
gwenhwyfar wrote:thanks. i love you, junkie. you are still my hero.

does that mean we can get to work on that porn? j/k
you and evel are good peeps. sorry i didnt hang with you gals more.
nexttime....
weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

baby, as far as saturday night, think nothing of it. considering who you were with, i wouldn't have hung out with me much either. its okay, we'll always have the women's bathroom.

Codeine Coma · Post by **Codeine Coma** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 3:47 am

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Snap Dragon....
Stayout of the Dumpster!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Question for the Junkie....

In your opinion...
Do the majority of women actually prefer a man/woman/men/women to caress their breasts with the hands/hand,or lick,suck,bite, or a combination of all?

...Not that I have any problems in this area....atleast I think not. Just curious.

Hooray for BOOBIES! :boobs:

gwenhwyfar · Post by **gwenhwyfar** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 10:20 am

depends on the woman.

Mistress Eve(L) · Post by **Mistress Eve(L)** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 12:16 pm

yeah that REALLY depends on the woman. But prefer one to either ask before any of the above and for junkie to address them at his eye level calling them each individually mary Kate adn Ashley.........I thought it was funny

The Stormstress · Post by **The Stormstress** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 2:01 pm

Codeine Coma wrote: In your opinion...
Do the majority of women actually prefer a man/woman/men/women to caress their breasts with the hands/hand,or lick,suck,bite, or a combination of all?

Variez by mood & woman... & don't forget squeezing & clawing :twisted:

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 6:43 pm

to answer this:
my girlfriend read over my shoulder and immediately replied its a combination....
and i agree but the problem with the way you asked the question is by using the phrase majority of women.
if we polled all the women in the country... maybe groups of 100's or 1000's would agree on an exact combination.. but thats not enough of a statistic to represent the population of the whole country, then expand that idea to the women of the world and how vast culture varies....
staggerly exponential growth rates against the possiblity of ever having a statisticly significant way to please womens boobies...
so in closing::
the majority of women want men/women to be attentive enough to figure out what they like with their boobies.... and most other things too.

iblis · Post by **iblis** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 8:40 pm

Here's one for the great and wise junkie, to confuse the masses with:

What's the most obfuscated JAPH you've ever encountered?

</geek>

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Sun Jan 18, 2004 10:42 pm

iblis wrote:Here's one for the great and wise junkie, to confuse the masses with:

What's the most obfuscated JAPH you've ever encountered?

</geek>

thats funny as hell..
had to read thru it a few times to make sure it was for real.. wow. someone hates their life.
reminds me of this language...also located here...
brainfuck is insane....

Kilashayne · Post by **Kilashayne** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 12:51 am

in the expression topsy-turvy, what exactly is meant by turvy?

if there are multiple universes, what is the thing they're all part of called?

why is it women's tennis but ladies' golf?

and finally, why aren't there any really disturbing pop songs, like "Tomorrow I'm Gonna Fuck Your Wife"?

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 1:05 am

Kilashayne wrote:in the expression topsy-turvy, what exactly is meant by turvy?
if there are multiple universes, what is the thing they're all part of called?
why is it women's tennis but ladies' golf?
and finally, why aren't there any really disturbing pop songs, like "Tomorrow I'm Gonna Fuck Your Wife"?

1)i think that topsy turvy was actually topsy curvy and about 69ing large breasted women.... but much like for sure became fo shizzle, it was modified to confuse people.....
:boobies:

2) comic books say mulitverse
sci fi says galaxy
fantasy calls it different planes
i say who the fuck cares that moron bush WANTS TO SEND US TO MARS?!!??!?!?!?! first he makes us dirt poor, makes the rich richer, and NOW HE WANTS TO GO TO MARS?? THE ONLY WAY I ENDORSE THE MASS BILLIONS WE GOTTA PUMP INTO THAT HORSESHIT IS IF WE SEND EVER BLOOD REALTIVE OF BUSH AND THE CYBORG-DICK (why dont more people make fun of DICK and BUSH...) DID YOU WATCH THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS? THE FUCKING UNION HASNT BEEN THIS DIVIDED SINCE THE CIVIL WAR?!?!?!?!??
he even lied in it. 2000 govenment jobs were created last year, a low thats not been that low since the depression. and hes says jobs are on the rise... productivity is marginial.... bullshit bullshit bullshit. and forcing christianity (thou i dig jesus) in policy and saying its religious (like its the only one and defearing the purpose of christianity and freedom of religion) and mandatory drug testing in high schools (invasion of privacy), cutting over time, blah blah blah hes SCUM. hes a NAZI. the patriot act (read that. tons of hidden clauses that impeed your rights)... the homeland security act... and he wants to blow MILLIONS TO GO SAY NA NOO NA NOO ON MARS!! lets go and throw him out the goddamn airlock.
anyway
its meant for humor, so dont blast me cuz you dont agree. just quit taking yourself so fucking serious and laugh. these times are about to get hard, and if dont start laughin now, its all fucked.
3)womens tennis is (kinda) a sport. i mean when im watching that anna chick pull her underwear out of her ass, i dont think "WOW WHAT A LADY!" And ratings show thats about the only womens tennis we watch......... but it exists internationally... naming conventions... and theres actual athletics involved here (and quite a bit).. many races and builds and ages play...
there is NO ATHLETHICS in golf at all and its played only by old ass white women... and they arent women, they are republicans... so they have up all good female traits years ago to be brainwashed... i mean lady-like.....
<quasiserious sexism satire on the average american male>
AND FURTHERMORE WHO THE FUCK WATCHES, OR CARES ABOUT LADIES GOLF? I MEAN THERES NO SPORTS HERE.. ITS FUCKING BORING.. AND NO SEXUAL ORGANS RANDOMLY COME OUT!! WE WATCH WOMENS BASKETBALL AND WE WATCH THE TEAMS THAT SUCK BECAUSE THE CUTE ONES ARE ON THOSE TEAMS MUCH THE WAY THAT ANNA SUCKS AT TENNIS BUT WE TUNE IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
</quasiserious sexism satire on the average american male>
if you took that serious, kill yourself.

4) listen to more mike patton bands... hes made some damn close
and i will GLADLY write them if codeine coma records em, we get some chickie to sing it, and i get to do the male vocals like luther vandross/ keith sweat / biz markie.

Reverend_ Hate · Post by **Reverend_ Hate** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 2:20 am

why dont more people make fun of DICK and BUSH

I have often wondered this myself.

Nexxus23 · Post by **Nexxus23** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 5:12 am

junkie christ wrote:4) listen to more mike patton bands... hes made some damn close

J_C, you rawk. I love me some Mikey Patton goodness...

*Nexxus23 wanders off to play some old skool FNM and Mr.B tunes...

gwenhwyfar · Post by **gwenhwyfar** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 2:32 pm

junkie, you are still my hero. and prove yourself more and more worthy of of that title everyday.

iblis · Post by **iblis** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 8:51 pm

junkie christ wrote:
iblis wrote:Here's one for the great and wise junkie, to confuse the masses with:

What's the most obfuscated JAPH you've ever encountered?

</geek>

thats funny as hell..
had to read thru it a few times to make sure it was for real.. wow. someone hates their life.
reminds me of this language...also located here...
brainfuck is insane....

I like brainfuck. After all, it's just pinter arithmetic.

As for perl obfuscation and JAPH, I think my favorite would have to be this:

Code: Select all

#Erudil from http://www.perlmonks.com/
#!/usr/bin/perl -w                                      # camel code
use strict;

                                           $_='ev
                                       al("seek\040D
           ATA,0,                  0;");foreach(1..3)
       {<DATA>;}my               @camel1hump;my$camel;
  my$Camel  ;while(             <DATA>){$_=sprintf("%-6
9s",$_);my@dromedary           1=split(//);if(defined($
_=<DATA>)){@camel1hum        p=split(//);}while(@dromeda
 ry1){my$camel1hump=0      ;my$CAMEL=3;if(defined($_=shif
        t(@dromedary1    ))&&/\S/){$camel1hump+=1<<$CAMEL;}
       $CAMEL--;if(d   efined($_=shift(@dromedary1))&&/\S/){
      $camel1hump+=1  <<$CAMEL;}$CAMEL--;if(defined($_=shift(
     @camel1hump))&&/\S/){$camel1hump+=1<<$CAMEL;}$CAMEL--;if(
     defined($_=shift(@camel1hump))&&/\S/){$camel1hump+=1<<$CAME
     L;;}$camel.=(split(//,"\040..m`{/J\047\134}L^7FX"))[$camel1h
      ump];}$camel.="\n";}@camel1hump=split(/\n/,$camel);foreach(@
      camel1hump){chomp;$Camel=$_;y/LJF7\173\175`\047/\061\062\063\
      064\065\066\067\070/;y/12345678/JL7F\175\173\047`/;$_=reverse;
       print"$_\040$Camel\n";}foreach(@camel1hump){chomp;$Camel=$_;y
        /LJF7\173\175`\047/12345678/;y/12345678/JL7F\175\173\0 47`/;
         $_=reverse;print"\040$_$Camel\n";}';;s/\s*//g;;eval;   eval
           ("seek\040DATA,0,0;");undef$/;$_=<DATA>;s/\s*//g;(   );;s
             ;^.*_;;;map{eval"print"$_"";}/.{4}/g; __DATA__   \124
               \1   50\145\040\165\163\145\040\157\1 46\040\1  41\0
                    40\143\141  \155\145\1 54\040\1   51\155\  141
                    \147\145\0  40\151\156 \040\141    \163\16 3\
                     157\143\   151\141\16  4\151\1     57\156
                     \040\167  \151\164\1   50\040\      120\1
                     45\162\   154\040\15    1\163\      040\14
                     1\040\1   64\162\1      41\144       \145\
                     155\14    1\162\       153\04        0\157
                      \146\     040\11     7\047\         122\1
                      45\15      1\154\1  54\171          \040
                      \046\         012\101\16            3\16
                      3\15           7\143\15             1\14
                      1\16            4\145\163           \054
                     \040            \111\156\14         3\056
                    \040\         125\163\145\14         4\040\
                    167\1        51\164\1  50\0         40\160\
                  145\162                              \155\151
                \163\163                                \151\1
              57\156\056
%%

Yeah, Erudil rocks.

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 10:30 pm

think geek used to have the code camel on a tshirt...

Codeine Coma · Post by **Codeine Coma** » Fri Jan 23, 2004 8:40 am

Another set questions for the Junkie Christ...

Please,answer this seriously.
1. A woman has 100 yards of cloth on a single roll,and she wants to divide it into 100 lengths of 1 yard each. It takes her 3 seconds to cut each length. Working non-stop,how long will it take her to cut all 100 pieces?

Answer these however you see fit.
2. I recently started to download games. Can you tell me the difference between a DMG file and a CD crack file?

3. Translate the following...

1. Arma virumque cano
2. Is das hundewetter?

4. Is their a difference between hot and cold?

And lastly...
5. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?

As always...thanks for your wisdom.

junkie christ · Post by **junkie christ** » Fri Jan 23, 2004 12:47 pm

Codeine Coma wrote:Another set questions for the Junkie Christ...Please,answer this seriously.
1. A woman has 100 yards of cloth on a single roll,and she wants to divide it into 100 lengths of 1 yard each. It takes her 3 seconds to cut each length. Working non-stop,how long will it take her to cut all 100 pieces?

unless you put a trick in this, 5 minutes.
im too fucking tired to look for a neat little trick.

Answer these however you see fit.
2. I recently started to download games. Can you tell me the difference between a DMG file and a CD crack file?

ones useful ones not. cracks rule the shit in software youd need one for...
theres a plethora of websites for "warez" that will assist in this more than i can seeing as i never download games... but next time im at your place ill point you in the right direction. i know you what your talking about but id need to see this .DMG file cuz offhand its not ringing bells. but i also just woke up...

3. Translate the following...
1. Arma virumque cano
2. Is das hundewetter?

Weapon virumque white Is gives to hundewetter? i see some spanish lookin words i know..
just 2. is the dog weather?? german is off if thats the intent
i suck with languages. invalid question, theres no real question here. im not posting my decryption standards and asking people to figure those out...

4. Is their a difference between hot and cold?

temp.?
one feels good on my nuts, one doesnt?
one cooks my pizza one doesnt?
cold beer is rokken like dokken and hot beer sucks worse than a creed CD on repeat?
poland and africa?
that gerlie from underworld and oprah?
danzig and dr.phil?
farscape and girls gone wild?
sushi or feces (though some would argue theres not much difference)?
i think thats enough examples

And lastly...5. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?As always...thanks for your wisdom.

depends on how much of a slut you are...
me? 42......................
weeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shaggy · Post by **Shaggy** » Fri Jan 23, 2004 8:00 pm

Alright...first off I wanna thank junkie and everyone who's posted (this has kept me entertained for the last couple days).

Ok...question time!

Guinness or New Castle?

Why was I up till 9 am today drinking, reading this section of the dumpster, and staring at my friends new nipple piercings?

And lastly, when are you fucking comming to NC to hang out!!!!!???

Random Junkie Christ Thread

Oi!