I'm drafting a letter of apology...
Posted: Mon Dec 06, 2004 8:22 pm
(I read this today...though it was originally posted in November of 2002 by the author of "Too Much Coffee Man" it is still funny.)
I'm drafting a letter of apology... It's a rough... comments welcome.
Dear Rest of the World,
I want to extend my heartfelt apologies to world for the behavior of the United States of America. I'm sorry for all the war, pollution, most of the technology, culture, politics, and undue influence. Often we were motivated by business, greed, and power. There is no excuse.
I'm also sorry that we consume so much of the world's resources when we're such a small portion of the worlds population. I'm sorry that our cars and factories have contributed so much to the hole in the ozone and global warming. It's a problem that affects everyone. We're selfish. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for nuclear weapons. I know when we first invented the bomb we thought it was inevitable–if we didn't do it, someone else would. But still, we did it first and I'm sorry for it. In retrospect I think it was a bad idea to have something that could destroy all life on the planet even if it was to save some lives ending a war 6 months early.
Sorry to decedents, in and out of the US. Our nuclear waste is going to be toxic for over 10,000 years. Civilizations generally don't last more that a couple thousand years–at best. Somebody, sometime in the future will be dealing with a lot of radioactive crap. Sorry.
Hollywood is an amazing propaganda machine that pumps out ideological crap and sells it to the rest of the world. Sorry about that. I feel like we've contributed to a general moral decay, and a glorification of materialism. We've defined of stereotypes, validated clichés, and encouraged prejudice. I'm sorry that Hollywood acts as a mouthpiece for all our stupidity.
I also feel bad that Hollywood is such a siren song for so many people. People see movies and TV and move to the US. The exodus of people from their countries, especially 3rd world countries, is a drain on their human resources.
I feel bad for pushing our ideology on the rest of the world. It just seems hypocritical since we still have serious problems with racism, sexism, class, social security, health care, poverty, homeless, crime, guns, and alienation.
We're pushing democracy on the rest of the world, and that makes me feel bad. I'm pretty sure it's better than fascism but It's we haven't worked out the the problems. In fact, technically, we don't even live in a democracy, we live in a republic. We elect representatives who elect the president. Ultimately, the popular vote is ignored, as we saw in the most recent presidential election. I'm not even going to mention the problems with counting the votes. Even if the voting were worked out the politicians themselves are beholding to the business interests that finance the political campaigns.
Sorry for all the weird technology that we're giving the rest of the world. Television is a worldwide social experiment and we have no idea the long term effects are. Same goes with genetically modified foods, automobiles, and the internet.
I feel bad about how our country began; non-native americans claim discovery, kill indians, break treaties, and import slaves. It's not a beginning to brag about.
Sorry our foreign policy. We've killed way too many civilians, ruined economies, sold way too many weapons, and set up too many puppet dictators that we later have to fight.
And I'm sorry about the mullet haircut. It's ugly.
There's lots more to be sorry about. But that's a start.
Sincerely,
Shannon Wheeler
http://www.tmcm.com/
I'm drafting a letter of apology... It's a rough... comments welcome.
Dear Rest of the World,
I want to extend my heartfelt apologies to world for the behavior of the United States of America. I'm sorry for all the war, pollution, most of the technology, culture, politics, and undue influence. Often we were motivated by business, greed, and power. There is no excuse.
I'm also sorry that we consume so much of the world's resources when we're such a small portion of the worlds population. I'm sorry that our cars and factories have contributed so much to the hole in the ozone and global warming. It's a problem that affects everyone. We're selfish. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for nuclear weapons. I know when we first invented the bomb we thought it was inevitable–if we didn't do it, someone else would. But still, we did it first and I'm sorry for it. In retrospect I think it was a bad idea to have something that could destroy all life on the planet even if it was to save some lives ending a war 6 months early.
Sorry to decedents, in and out of the US. Our nuclear waste is going to be toxic for over 10,000 years. Civilizations generally don't last more that a couple thousand years–at best. Somebody, sometime in the future will be dealing with a lot of radioactive crap. Sorry.
Hollywood is an amazing propaganda machine that pumps out ideological crap and sells it to the rest of the world. Sorry about that. I feel like we've contributed to a general moral decay, and a glorification of materialism. We've defined of stereotypes, validated clichés, and encouraged prejudice. I'm sorry that Hollywood acts as a mouthpiece for all our stupidity.
I also feel bad that Hollywood is such a siren song for so many people. People see movies and TV and move to the US. The exodus of people from their countries, especially 3rd world countries, is a drain on their human resources.
I feel bad for pushing our ideology on the rest of the world. It just seems hypocritical since we still have serious problems with racism, sexism, class, social security, health care, poverty, homeless, crime, guns, and alienation.
We're pushing democracy on the rest of the world, and that makes me feel bad. I'm pretty sure it's better than fascism but It's we haven't worked out the the problems. In fact, technically, we don't even live in a democracy, we live in a republic. We elect representatives who elect the president. Ultimately, the popular vote is ignored, as we saw in the most recent presidential election. I'm not even going to mention the problems with counting the votes. Even if the voting were worked out the politicians themselves are beholding to the business interests that finance the political campaigns.
Sorry for all the weird technology that we're giving the rest of the world. Television is a worldwide social experiment and we have no idea the long term effects are. Same goes with genetically modified foods, automobiles, and the internet.
I feel bad about how our country began; non-native americans claim discovery, kill indians, break treaties, and import slaves. It's not a beginning to brag about.
Sorry our foreign policy. We've killed way too many civilians, ruined economies, sold way too many weapons, and set up too many puppet dictators that we later have to fight.
And I'm sorry about the mullet haircut. It's ugly.
There's lots more to be sorry about. But that's a start.
Sincerely,
Shannon Wheeler
http://www.tmcm.com/