• Mall Mission

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:12 pm**

Okay, now, I'm not a huge fan of the mall, but these people take it waaaay to far.

http://objective.jesussave.us/mallmission.html

"But surely malls are just places of commerce, not deliberate attempts to lead people away from Christ," you may be thinking to yourself. Unfortunately the facts point to the malls' knowing complicity with the cause of anti-Christian Secularism. Besides the complete lack of Christian references in their so-called Christmas displays and decorations (just try and find a Cross or depiction of the Baby Jesus amongst all the Santas and snowmen and shiny balls), more subtle subconscious suggestions of Secularism's anti-Christian stance can be found by studying the names of common mall stores:

* J.C. Penny - The J.C. makes us think of Jesus Christ, thus associating our Lord with the lowest monetary value, the penny (even Judas valued Him at 30 pieces of silver!).
* Sears - What the flesh of the damned does in Hell. It also sounds like "seers", Pagan mystics who engaged in occult premonitions.
* Cinnabon - Sounds like "Sin Upon".
* Orange Julius - Named for the Pagan Emperor of Rome. This company's mascot was once a devil, until they changed it to hide their true intentions.
* Hot Topic - A recent store aimed at children that openly sells devil paraphernalia. Any guess as to why "hot" is in their name?
* Hallmark Gold Crown Stores - Purveyors of Santamas tree ornaments depicting anthropomorphized woodland creatures (reference to Evolutionism) and Harry Potter merchandise. What notable person will have a mark and wear crowns? [Rev. 13:16, 13:1]

Clearly there are ulterior motives evident. Even the word "mall" evokes evilness being a homonym for "maul" - the violent rending of flesh - and "mal" - Latin for "bad" and root for words like "malicious" and "malevolent". These Malls of the Damned - open even on Sunday! - are no innocent business centers, but active parties in the conspiracy to promote Secularism.

Wow. Seriously.

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:25 pm**

LOL OMFG that is so sad!

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:36 pm**

And I thought I had too much time on my hands.

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:37 pm**

Is this a joke? I swear, i'm going to punch someone in the eye for this.

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:40 pm**

Well this is BULLSHIT! I fucked Santa and I know for a fact that his balls aren't goddamn shiny!

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:41 pm**

Coor wrote:Well this is BULLSHIT! I fucked Santa and I know for a fact that his balls aren't goddamn shiny!

They were after you slobbered on them.
:twisted:

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:41 pm**

mmmm.... Cinnabon...

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:45 pm**

-just hangs head-

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:47 pm**

Russo... don't make me...

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:53 pm**

Coor wrote:Russo... don't make me...

Okay, okay, I'm sorry. You didn't slobber on Santa's balls. You are too much of a lady to do such a thing. Forgive me?

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:56 pm**

LOL! I didn't have anything to follow up with, but ok I guess. You are my favorite lil *censored* in the whole WIDEST world.

You know you love me

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 5:46 pm**

ummm...
those people are serious?
remember my proposition for legal murder day????????

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 10:05 pm**

Wow...this person thinks waaaay to much. Wether they are serious or not. Scary.

Coor: If the Santa you fucked didn't have shiny balls, then it wasn't the *real* Santa. The *real* Santa does, in fact, have red shiny balls, and candycane stripes on his dick.

Dear God, I need more sleep. :oops:

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 11:19 pm**

heywaitaminute
my name is JC..
should i be offended that im only worth a penny too???

Posted: **Mon Dec 06, 2004 11:24 pm**

junkie christ wrote:heywaitaminute
my name is JC..
should i be offended that im only worth a penny too???

You cheap whore.
:twisted:

Posted: **Tue Dec 07, 2004 12:44 am**

lol. Come on know Russo. Who are you to be calling other people cheap whores? Yea, that's what I thought.

Posted: **Tue Dec 07, 2004 1:08 am**

junkie christ wrote:ummm...
those people are serious?
remember my proposition for legal murder day????????

I think we should have a whole hunting season for stupid people. I've always believed that would help this world immensely.

Posted: **Tue Dec 07, 2004 9:59 am**

Now...if you guys would just support my nation-wide IQ test...we would know who was fair game...

Also, I do think that the mall is a place of Satan...But then again...I also think that the Whitehouse, Television, & The Internet are too...What are they gonna do...Crusify us? :dgos:

Posted: **Tue Dec 07, 2004 10:29 am**

that's the funniest shit i ever saw. Evil Santa?? "darth maul sounds like 'mall'' how ignorant can organized christianity be? i think we should do something about all these crazy fucks, like get them out to a dollar movie or a club every now and then. i mean, we're talking about people who look at sex as a sin, so i can't say get them laid.

{carNie}

Posted: **Tue Dec 07, 2004 10:48 am**

what do you guys care anyway?
the mall is gay
yeah, I wanna go be surrounded by 14 year old girls and juggalos who have nothing better to do but spend all day in a mall
it's commerce, man
you go, you buy shit, you leave
that's how it should be
'stead of hanging out all fuckin day
mallrats